Sonder: Why I Photograph the Way I Do
I learned a word that made the world feel a little quieter..
Sonder.
The realization that every person you pass is living a life just as vivid, complicated, and emotionally layered as your own.
Every stranger has a backstory. Every couple has history. Every guest at a wedding is carrying a private universe we’ll never fully see.
And somehow, knowing that makes everything feel more meaningful.
Grab something to sip on, stay awhile, because I’m getting philosophical
I think about sonder a lot in everyday moments. Sitting in a coffee shop. Watching people come and go. Someone laughs a little too loudly. Someone stares out the window a little too long. Someone checks their phone and their whole posture shifts.
You don’t know what just happened but something did.
That’s sonder.
It’s the quiet reminder that the world doesn’t revolve around us alone, even though it can feel that way sometimes. We’re all the main character in our own story, walking past hundreds of other stories.
And honestly? That realization changed the way I see people.
It softened me. Slowed me down.
Sonder & Wedding Photography
It’s probably why I photograph weddings the way I do.
When I document a wedding day, I’m not just photographing a timeline or a set of events. I’m witnessing the intersection of entire lives. Two people with their own pasts, habits, fears, and inside jokes choosing to stand still together for a moment and say “this matters.”
Surrounded by people who shaped them in ways they may not even fully realize.
Parents. Grandparents. Friends who’ve been there since earlier versions of themselves. People who know the backstory behind that laugh or that tear.
That’s not just a wedding day. That’s sonder in motion.
Why I Focus on the In-Between Moments
I’m drawn to the quiet moments most people don’t notice.
The deep breath before walking down the aisle.
The squeeze of a hand when no one’s watching.
The way shoulders drop once the pressure lifts.
The split second when someone realizes… this is really happening.
Those moments are small, but they’re heavy. They carry entire inner worlds inside them.
That’s what I’m always looking for as a wedding photographer. Not perfection, not performance, not stiff posing. Just truth. Presence. Connection.
Because the most meaningful photographs aren’t loud.
They’re honest.
Photography as a Way of Seeing
Sonder reminds me to assume there’s always more happening beneath the surface.
More emotion.
More history.
More tenderness than what’s immediately visible.
And maybe that’s the point of photography… at least for me.
Not to manufacture meaning.
Not to force moments.
But to pause long enough to say: this mattered to someone.
Whether it’s a wedding day, or a quiet couples session, the heart of it is the same.
Two people carrying entire, separate lives, yet chooses to be present with each other in these shared moments. Thats where true magic thrives.
And maybe, just maybe… in that pause, we feel it too. It’s beautiful and terrifying simultaneously.
